I’ve been thinking about the last few days about the distance that grew/popped up between us and whose fault it is. Yours, mine, or fates? And i’m not trying to place or take blame for it….Ain’t no angels here… Life has dealt us both some shitty cards since the day I met you, lost you, found you, and in some ways lost you again… You missed my point the other night because your so damn stubborn (not that i’m any better!) and that was that it is not bad to live day to day… but as I said if your so focused on today that you will miss tomorrow… by that I meant that a friend who wants to see you and you deny even talking about it as you’d rather be silent in some kinda statement of i’m not sure what – tells me all I need to know. I’ve been upfront and gave all I can, its not about winning, losing, or some competition. I don’t play games like that. All I wanted from the start and today is you be happy… Never once did my own well being play into that…. not once. And all I asked is we setup a time to be together as friends… and that was too much for you apparently. And if you think i’m just being a jerk because I was rejected, not at all. I’m just being honest as I always have. I could rant here and hit home badly with facts & things that aren’t public, but I won’t as I am taking the high road as I’ve always strive to do. Yes you hurt me, but that happens – I’ll get over it. What really kills me is you value what could be in the moment today over the joy of what we built as friends…. As honest as I have been you need to be prodded to even begin to do the same, yet i’m the bad guy….. Sure a few will think this about them but you know who you are.
“I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken – and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.” ~ Margaret Mitchell